30 Signs Your Kid Is Turning Into A Hipster


1. They start wearing sunglasses inside.

2. On Saturday mornings you find them watching Inspector Gadget episodes on VHS.

3. They seek out local hand-crafted artisan root beer.

4. The origin of the cacao bean in their chocolate bar is of the utmost importance.

5. They’ll only drink milk out of mason jars.

6. When you bring home new clothes they ask if the cotton weaver was paid a fair wage.

7. If you offer them a chicken nugget they act like you are trying to poison them.

8. They want to meet their friends at thrift stores.

9. Their temporary tattoo collection is epic.

10. Dogs are too mainstream, so they ask for a pet chicken.

11. The only character toy they own is a vintage She-Ra doll.

12. Suddenly they hate their rainbow loom.

13. Their skinny jeans are two sizes too small on purpose.

14. You overhear them say to their friends, “I watched Pixar shorts before Disney acquired them.”

15. They ask for extra allowance to cover their green juice addiction.

16. All the words to that Frozen song they were singing last month have slipped their mind.

17. They are taking banjo lessons from that old guy in the park.

18. Their favorite T-shirt has Bill Murray’s face on it.

19. They start requesting obscure French cartoons for family movie night.

20. Somehow they acquired their own sourdough starter and plan to open their own pop-up bread stand in their friend’s garage.

21. Suddenly they seem to know everything. Like, really know everything.

22. You hear them name dropping on the playground.

23. They only listen to bands they found on Vimeo you’ve probably never heard of.

24. It starts taking them an hour to get ready because they need to make their hair look like they don’t care how it looks.

25. They’ve taken up whittling.

26. They open an Instagram account that has more followers than you @UrbanMoonRocket.

27. They gave all the wrong answers on their eye test on purpose so they could get ugly glasses.

28. In the middle of the night they turned their two-wheeler into a “fixie”.

29. After school one day they say, “I am being confined by the boundaries of traditional education.”

30. When you ask them what they want to be when they grow up they say, “I want to be a creative type. Maybe live off the grid and spend time with my three legged cat and eat kale from my organic garden.”


// Jennifer Latch is an artist and mother of three girls living in San Francisco. Here are the links to connect with her on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook. She can also be reached at jen@oururbanplayground.com//

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30 responses

  1. This is the funniest thing on the internet LOL- And i KNOW my Chloe did NOT say all those things! I will have her a month and rest easy after that!

    • You can always accessorize those hives with an artisan sustainable straw wide brim hat and crepe de chine scarf sourced from silk worms raised on locally sourced organic white mulberry leaves.

  2. Don’t forget, she asks for a record player for her birthday so she can start listening to all her music on vinyl…

  3. Oh my gosh, when did you meet my oldest?!? A lot of these are totally accurate for her. I should be reassured that she isn’t some anomaly. Great post!!

  4. God lord, this is my granddaughter. Last year all she wanted to eat was McNuggets. Now she won’t touch them. “They’re GMO, Gramma”. She’s 10.

    • I tried to feed my daughter McDonalds when we were delayed at the airport and she looked like I was trying to poised her. It’s what inspired this post!

  5. Funny thing is that this is the same stuff that is said about most homeschool kids, except most don’t think they are cool. Hmmmm……

  6. Too funny, I was just had a conversation with a friend of mine over Bill Murray. Him — I just saw a kid with a Bill Murray sticker on his car. Me — It was a hipster. Him — What? Me — kids these days love Bill Murray because he plays a quirky grandpa in indie movies. Him — I didn’t know he had done anything since Ghostbusters.

    I live next to Cartoon Network so I am well versed in hipster. Its a dream job for the little nippers. So don’t worry, there might be more in your child’s future than kale, like a Kate Spade bike w artisan woven basket and a minimum wage job in tv that will pay at least 1/2 of the rent if she doesn’t mind 3 roommates.

  7. Oh my gosh, I didn’t know I was a hipster.
    My kids, maybe not… They’d still love chicken nuggets three or four times a week.
    We do have a pet chicken who gets rides down the slide, and they can go pull a carrot out of my front yard garden whenever they want. Work in progress?
    Sorry, gotta run, gotta change my kefir milk….

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